Hi there. It sounds like you are having a difficult time. The law says that both parents are the most important people in your children’s lives. This means that the best parenting arrangements are those arrangements where: the children continue a meaningful relationship with both parents, both parents share responsibility for the children, and the children live a safe environment without violence or abuse.

There are three ways in which parenting arrangements can be made after parents separate or stop living together. The first and simplest way to make parenting arrangements is by sitting down with your partner and reaching an agreement on parenting and custody arrangements for your children. There is no need to go to court. You can simply make a ‘parenting plan’ with your partner. This is a written agreement that sets out the parenting arrangements for your children. A parenting plan is not legally enforceable, which means the agreement cannot be enforced if one parent fails to fulfil their responsibilities.

The second way to make parenting arrangements is where both parents agree on parenting arrangements but want the arrangement to be legally enforceable. You and your partner will need to obtain ‘consent orders’ approved by a court. This is a written agreement containing the details of the parenting and financial arrangements as they relate to your children. A court must be satisfied that the orders are in the best interests of your children before approving them. If either parent fails to comply with these orders, the other parent can commence legal proceedings to enforce compliance. Intentionally disobeying court orders can result in penalties.

The third way to make parenting arrangements arises where the parents are unable to reach an agreement themselves. In this situation, one or both parents will need to apply to court to resolve the dispute. Parties are required to first attend mediation. If the matter progresses to a court hearing, the court will make ‘parenting orders’, which may cover who your children will live with, how much time they will spend with each parent, the allocation of parental responsibility, and how the children will communicate with each parent. If one parent breaches a parenting order, the other parent (or another significant person in your children’s life) can start legal proceedings to enforce compliance.